Author Topic: A Brief, Incomplete and Mostly Wrong History of Programming Languages  (Read 643 times)

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Offline vezzy

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I don't know if any of you guys have read this before, but here goes: http://james-iry.blogspot.com/2009/05/brief-incomplete-and-mostly-wrong.html

My favorites:

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1983 - Bjarne Stroustrup bolts everything he's ever heard of onto C to create C++. The resulting language is so complex that programs must be sent to the future to be compiled by the Skynet artificial intelligence. Build times suffer. Skynet's motives for performing the service remain unclear but spokespeople from the future say "there is nothing to be concerned about, baby," in an Austrian accented monotones. There is some speculation that Skynet is nothing more than a pretentious buffer overrun.

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1986 - Brad Cox and Tom Love create Objective-C, announcing "this language has all the memory safety of C combined with all the blazing speed of Smalltalk." Modern historians suspect the two were dyslexic.

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1995 - At a neighborhood Italian restaurant Rasmus Lerdorf realizes that his plate of spaghetti is an excellent model for understanding the World Wide Web and that web applications should mimic their medium. On the back of his napkin he designs Programmable Hyperlinked Pasta (PHP). PHP documentation remains on that napkin to this day.
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Offline Darkvision

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Re: A Brief, Incomplete and Mostly Wrong History of Programming Languages
« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2013, 12:14:07 am »
this might have just made my day. enjoy the cookie
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